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I was, just sailing by

On, the friendly water

Blue.

As she followed my wake

Just by my side

Quiet.

And, as I asked her

‘Do you love the ocean, that is blue?

Like I do, tell me my dear…’

Pondering.

And she with those full lips

Smiling her gentle smile told me…

‘Who does not love the ocean

With its boundless waves, carefree

Who doesn’t want to explore its enigmatic depths

even shackled men do, despite slaving daily as they live’

Surprisingly

So, her voice ended in a melody

The sweetest that I had ever heard

With that soft touch of hers on my shoulder

that made me wonder endlessly

Always

 what would It be like

To continue without that

And live as I,

Alone.

I loveless.

Let me...

My mama told me
Never to dream big
And live, just live,
 the life as it is..,
choose a vocation
get married, have children
and eventually die aged..

But I dare, I dare!
To be a dreamer
To be a rebel
And reach out with
My mind.. my body and my soul
To those dreams, those stars...

Dreaming to stand as one of them
In the place, there in the dark darkest
There to shine brighter than the brightest
Leaving behind the choice
The world that I know offers so
so, to instigate a qualm in dearie heart mine
Where happiness seems unreal
Where I will not be me, anymore

So, mama let me die young
And be a dreamer who dreams on
And be a rebel who reaches out
With. my mind my body and my soul
To those dreams, those stars…

Vagabond

Life is too long 

without shared love
without a place to belong

that place, called home

A life that of a vagabond

If never in surface, then inside
deep down inside, alone

 searches there in himself, a life

Tries more, as he fails

things beyond and ordinary, 
finding such treasures in small cracks great

 giddy gladness and joy of understanding 

Under the open dark sky, he dreams

with musings, too wistful 
to lighten heart, yet it unexpectedly finds

such peace, away in silence, of mind i.e.

words....

Burying my darkness
as i hide that part of me
i always call myself
behind the veil of anonymity
behind the chasm of ignorance
i follow the light that shines brightest
but as i try to follow it with all the haste
it seems to be moving farther with each of my pace
nothing can help nothing i ever know

That were the last words of a dying man
which won't lie those words they say
cause he has nothing to lose or gain
maybe just a bit of agony as he breathes his last
maybe just a bit of regrets for promises unfulfilled
which bit by bit makes up for the whole that he is
unlike a living man who must lie at least once to live
unlike the children playing blissful in their ignorance
unlike any of them he is separate he is different
a entity just  about to begin a new journey of soul
to a destination unknown with darkness as its only guide
as he leaves behind his heavy dying vessel
to reach out for the light furthermost
..that shines brightest...

Far..

Far.. I see myself running away far
from eyes inquisitive, by the day, by the night
from dark hypnotic doors of soul they
they haunt my dreams, unexpectedly always
Though i hide myself in the darkest hole
or burn in the brightest halo my soul
there is no escape that seems to come
on my way, my path that salvation is false
...my conviction of my being fragile
...my memories swirls in longing of once
blinded i stagger nearly a mile
to that destiny of unknown, i fear, it to be, my doom
that door i know, is there somewhere disguised
fogged by illusion or is it delusion, a clever ploy
 I believed i had surpassed long ago
 I believed it gone and i was free
but uncertain are now, me and thoughts mine
me and thoughts mine....
that which haunts me
the sight i wish i never had 

Not you..

It's not you
its me
trying too hard
trying to keep you by my side
nearer to my beating heart

Now, i know
its not you
its me
for i gave you my all
my soul, my memories
but it was not enough
my time, my imperfect love
to you girl, to you only
no it was not enough
to break the silence
that silence you initiated
that has executed
a part of me without violence
a part of me clinging
to dreams of happiness of together
gone those gone on.. forever

It's not you
its me
now at peace
a lightness that comes
with time's kindness
with realization of foolishness
one can only have
when one is in love
when one wants to feel wanted
nothing more or else
just to be loved...

Choices

Hope
for a new tomorrow
 a tomorrow to come
nothing can stop it
no tide or time
if you believe, you will
if you give, you will receive
for the world returns in circle
so are the thoughts we think
search that which you need
you will find it, you will have it
like you should
will you? or you won't
choose...to try

Happy!

You do not believe you are beautiful
with those scars, those prominent dimples
But I do, I do think they have made you and more, dear
for those scars, are your passage to womanhood
for those dimples, are simple joy and hope of a child
And those attestations tell, without a single utter
What you have been through and through
to be what you are, a woman remarkable
more sure of what you feel and what you need
though doubts of your self you have still
as you convey that loneliness only you can feel
So.. here i am, so you can be, no more lonely, yes no more
so... i whisper soft these words so would you hear me
when you are ready to listen, my dearest happy
i, your admirer since the start of this; this story...

Remembering her

i remembered her
with her sweet smile
her dark hair left untied
her dimples prominent
and her eyes darker as night
i remembered her
walking carefree down the road
though alone her happiness so contagious
she had the best company of her own and so
 i remembered her
when days were dark and unhappy
that memory of hers cheered me up
lifting my spirit to that place
that place where hope pervaded
for a better tomorrow
and remembering her
i made myself breath a deep breath
in and out
relaxed
impossible nothing is
that thought flashing
continue i did
life
by remembering her

Fall

Remember
to forget
pleasure
the guilt ah
what a tragedy
one man can think
for himself without foresight
selfish man lonely man
so he feels so he makes another
another promise
of change to turn a new leaf
BUT there comes a but
that promise is a illusion
to be broken
to be stamped upon
for pleasure temporary
as long as it lasts what a heaven it is
and so the peak is reached but the fall
ah that fall the higher it was
the harder the crash back to reality
with the gravity of guilt
the life so is hell
though outside he looks same
though he is still a man in appearance
he feels he is not so
he is not so no he is not.

Deja Vu

As I wander in that garden
Where dreams are woven
By angels spreading their wings
Far above flowers
that offer feast for eyes
With perfume of nectar
An invitation silent
Broken only by music
In stupor I became breathless
as one can be... a mortal
amazed dazzled and all the thrills
tingling through the spine
so magnified my senses
so much stimulated i nearly fainted
nearly drowned ah it was a deja vu

Free

To be free
who does not want to be
be it a man a woman or a child
free...
free from worry
within which there is fear
of future that is to be
of past that tangles us in memories, best unremembered
and present where the mind mesmerized by them; future and past

free so we want to be
from...
the problems;  money success sex and life so and so
but unless we are free from ourselves
the perception of me that ego of self
where mind is attached to materials said easily
all efforts and time spent are naught
but a circle like a dog chasing his tail
with pleasure momentary of emptiness
and suffering even in company of loneliness
all is naught
until free we be from the confinement
that perception of self
then can we be
can we be... free, truly...

Too much

Maybe it was much
too much
to ask for that love
the love
only she could give
without conditions
it was much
too much
to ask for that love
the love
only she could give
with her presence
when i need it so
it was much
too much
just to ask
but... i did though refused
every day i ask for it
dear.. always
for i love you so...

Buzzz

What is to become of me
if you are not there
my friends
the truth;
i would be taking the longer way
to understand
the values
of learning
that only together
as people can be achieved...

angel without wings

To appreciate beauty
and worship light,
My soul, my body
ever, truly desires

The physical grace
and the mind behind,
Balanced It felt
when I gazed those eyes

And that voice,
the sweetest tweet,
Left me, no choice
but praise, only praise
angel you are, though without wings...

Mesmerizing eyes...

Those mesmerizing eyes
darker, than the lonely night
Without a moon as company
When met mine,
Surprised i,
I lost myself in their depth
So fathomless, so magnetic

Dearer never was this life
As that moment, that moment sublime
When her steady gaze caressed mine
Helpless I, was swept off my feet
Breathless, I knew why I lived
To be lost in them
To be found by them
 as mysterious she,
she who vanished so
So like the morning dew
When the sun rises high
That girl,
She of the mesmerizing eyes...

Once is enough!

Believe me
or don't believe me
See me
or don't see me
It matters not
when you hear my voice
For once is enough

From this corner of the world
where wanders my hungry soul
 with curiousity unsated, it tries so,
 so to understand
 what love is
an attraction mutual
or
is it just a wistful dream
That people dream
in ones and twos
Where life is,
 just is,
normal as it could be
where children play untouched
from scars
of poverty
of politics
of wars
 adults call righteous
under those flags
of religion
of nation
of race

Written
Words and numbers
pieces and pieces of paper
More loved they are
Than people
or the things it can buy
things such that confuses even almighty
dear it be even than life
born from the womb after months
in the throe of struggle
a mother can only know of
Imagine!
Can you... like I do

Believe me
Or don't believe me
See me
Or don't see me
When my voice reaches you
Once is enough!

P_s_b_l_t_

The heart of commerce
Where each one is going somewhere
Thus the ebb and flow continues
As I observe from where I remain

The very air seems so dear
I fear, it will be charged one day
With currency man invented
Where numbers will have sway

Likewise everything will have price
Only value will be different
It matters not, if you can sell
Be they seen or experienced

Life grows cheaper if it continues so
Conflicts of have and have nots
Behind the competition for prosperity
A future; a possibility of this world

Darkness... Silence...

Darkness
Silence
And pain
Excruciating such
There's no self
With memory to recall
Or feelings that glimmer
Only a sensation
That be, of desperation
A longing so potent
For touch tender
From one dearest
Her name forgotten
And face unclear
Resurfaces so vividly
For a moment
I can see
I can hear
Her smile warm
Her voice melodious
Before it vanishes without a trace
In darkness
In silence
Total.

Free style: Have to end

The wheel has turned
Another hour another day another year
But what have we learned
Another gain another friend another...
Have we learned to love to share
To be alive in experience of past
What of future to come, as I ask myself
The child has become a young man
Still have you changed
 that which you must; childhood habits
Taking grudge, reaction with anger
Have you truly changed
Fearing fear itself and hiding behind walls
Have you made a decision of a future
A career,  a vision of yourself to be
No I so answer I am living in bright present and letting off for morrow
What will be will be what's wrong with it, still when I look in the mirror,
I see one who has changed and one who makes goals how small they may be, my thoughts knocks the door of my mind
My widows of soul are open wide
So
Tis
This!
This,... have to end...

A miracle not to take for granted...

From the cradle
till the grave
They are present
for you always

It matters
None can deny
Their presence
Ve it all or be one only

It matters,
More than blood
Or wealth plenty
Or youth, that of spring
For it is, far, far beyond
Even the omnipotent time
That bond it is, stronger than diamond
That my friends you must cherish most
With people worth in weight of gold
Once connected it is forever
Even if not together
You will remember
In happy times
And lean days
Family of your true friends
Though not perfect
Though not rich
I swear it is a blessing
A miracle
Don't
Just don't
take it for granted
...

To birdy, a tribute,,,

Oh! how she suffers
when she sings so 
from her heart, open
wide open 
as deep her voice submerges
caressing the melodies that pierces 
soul that is mine
this time and another, 
with longing  for a life
together
we could never have...
that we could never live..

Her lyrics,
asking for time
asking for trust
asking for a peace of mind
that makes dreams come true
as in waves they touch tenderly
the beach, that is of my mind
cluttered with emotions
those scattered pebbles small
unsaid...untouched...unheard
they beg to be listened
when she sings so
sweetly
and
as clear as a crystal
polished...


oh birdy! please! sing not so!
though my ears ask for more
though my heart wants to be lost
in that sweet, voice of yours
that longs for love denied
as tears from my eyes are shed
as longing in heart, mine, too resurfaces
when I listen to that song you voiced 
once
twice
thrice
and again
and again
as the sun dies 
as the darkness descends
conflicting feeling such
Confused I, can't Comprehend 
Yet, blessed I am
I feel 
I know
I realize
for I can dream 
such a sunshine
you made me experience
that makes me
want to 
love 
again...

A Forgotten Chapter

"Then and now we make simple mistakes

 quickly those moments pass, despite meaning most
 Intent  to conciliate and re-conciliate
we drag on , what happens is, a nightmare worst"

"Like broken parts inside, we impress an image
childish so, those serrated crazy faults
the goodness inside forgotten, we feel an inner rage
such perception of injustice, lost, it is our entire world"

"Mortality is forgotten, we becomes 'i'
either we flee, or hurt one-another
such spite, christ! such a bitter life
let it be, live on i say, let it be, a forgotten chapter..."

...essence of every being

Water the essence of every being
mind with mind to ensure its purity
filter always with priority and boil with unstoppable passion
a passion, no less than 100%,
before, cooling some then drinking with open mind
feel, to feel, optimism of success, future will bring
for once drunk, it will reflect, for life
as a friend best or the enemy worst
water to you, to me, an essence so to every being...

5th march 2016